It"s always best to start your personal statement with an attention-grabbing intro. There are a lot of ways to do this - and I encourage you to explore other short stories or novels to see how the author has started them - but today I will share with you my top 8 hook-the-reader techniques.
1) Describe an image in a particular moment without giving too much away; use the senses to make the reader feel like they"re there:
Instinctively, I hold my breath. The pungent fragrance of roasted coffee beans and the shrill sound of steam whistles from the espresso machines force my senses into overload. Before me are mounds of freshly-baked goodies and colossal stacks of books piled on bookshelves as high as the ceiling.
Then add a sentence that explains what is happening:
Pressing my nose against the glass cover, I don’t budge until the ginormous chocolate-chip cookie is within my possession.
2) Drop the reader into a scene:
I could tell from the line between my mom"s eyes that something was up. She"d just picked up her phone to check a text that had come in, and as she read it, that line appeared.
She exhaled, hard. "Chloe can"t come."
3) Surprise the reader by stating something they totally don"t expect:
In the United States, legal adulthood comes at 18, but it is my understanding that adulthood comes through responsibility, tears, laughter, and most of all: parenthood. It is effortless to watch other people’s children grow and flourish, but having my own was a terrifying new world for which I was ill-prepared. I was not ready for my first, Stanley, but now I cannot envision a world without him. Today, I am the proud parent of not one, but seven beautiful, boisterous, carnivorous plants.
4) Make a surprising confession - something you might be judged for:
I’ve recently come to the realization that community service just isn’t for me. Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.
5) State a random personal fact:
I was born with an extra hand - kind of.
6) State a fact that might be unknown to the reader:
Tens of thousands of rubber ducks were lost at sea in 1992 and are still being discovered today.
7) Use a simile or metaphor - make a comparison to help explain a complicated topic:
When it comes to scary teeth, piranhas’ bite is among the most fearsome. Their razor-sharp teeth strip prey’s flesh with the ease of a butcher’s knife.
8) Start with a question that connects to a personal story:
Can a fish be depressed? This question has been floating around my head ever since I spent a night in a hotel across from an excruciatingly sad-looking Siamese fighting fish.
Whether you’ve already started your personal statement or not, these techniques will surely add pizzazz to your introduction. I suggest you play around with each of them until you find one that works for you and your story. And if you’ve already started drafting, read through what you’ve already written because you just might find your opening lines in the middle of your essay.
（以下是中文翻译）
你的个人陈述最好以引人注目的开场白开始。有很多方法可以做到这一点——我鼓励你去探索其他的短篇故事或小说，看看作者是如何写开头的——但今天我将与你分享我的8大吸引读者的技巧。
1)描述一个特定时刻的情景，但不要透露太多；使用感官让读者感觉他们就在那里：
本能地，我屏住了呼吸。烘焙咖啡豆的刺鼻香味和浓缩咖啡机汽笛刺耳的声音迫使我的感官过载。在我面前，是一堆刚出炉的美食，书架上有一大堆一大堆的书，一直堆到天花板那么高。
然后加上一个句子解释正在发生的事情：
我把鼻子紧贴在玻璃罩上，一动也不动，直到那块巨大的巧克力曲奇在我的手里。
2)将读者置于场景中：
从妈妈的眼神中，我可以看出有什么事情发生了。她刚刚拿起手机查看收到的一条短信，就在她读的时候，那条短信出现了。她深呼一口气，“克洛伊不能来。”
3)说一些出乎意料的话，让读者大吃一惊：
在美国，法定成年年龄是18岁，但我的理解是，成年经历了责任、泪水、欢笑，最重要的是：为人父母。看着别人的孩子茁壮成长是毫不费力的，但拥有自己的孩子却是一个可怕的新世界，对此我还没有准备好。我还没有准备好迎接我的第一次，斯坦利，但现在我无法想象一个没有他的世界。今天，我自豪地养育了七株美丽、喧闹、食肉植物，而不是一株。
4)做出令人惊讶的坦白——可能是你可能会因此被评断事情：
最近我意识到社区服务并不适合我。现在，在你开始做假设之前，请继续阅读。
5)随机陈述一个个人事实：
我生来就多了一只手。
6)陈述一个读者可能不知道的事实：
1992年，成千上万只橡皮鸭在海上失踪，至今仍在被发现。
7)使用明喻或暗喻——通过比较来帮助解释复杂的话题：
说到可怕的牙齿，食人鱼的咬伤是最可怕的。它们锋利的牙齿像屠夫的刀一样轻松地将猎物的肉割开。
8)从一个和个人经历有关的问题开始：
鱼会消沉吗？这个问题一直萦绕在我的脑海，自从我在酒店度过了一个晚上，对面是一条非常悲伤的暹罗斗鱼。
不管你是否已经开始了你的个人陈述，这些技巧肯定会给你的自我介绍增加活力。我建议你尝试一下，直到找到一个适合你和你的故事的方法。如果你已经开始起草个人陈述了，通读一下你已经写好的内容，因为你可能会在你的文章中间发现你的开场白。
